But this past week, I got to thinking.....why AM I still single? Do I want to be? Do I not want to be? Am I too picky?
My situation has a lot to do with it. Mainly when I was living with the ex. However, I've had guys who have shown interest in me. I have to say, I usually turn them down. Why? I'm not sure.
Then there are the guys who I show interest in, that turn me down. Mainly because of my kids. I've heard all the reasons. "I want to have my own kids." and "I don't think I can handle Autism." (If you had your own kid with Autism, would you give it up for adoption?)
If you HAD to deal with Autism, you would. I did. I get that people are afraid of it. But it's not catching. And I'm certainly not going to lure you to my house with the idea of watching a movie, and then throw Jacob at you while running away laughing hysterically. I trust very few people with him. And even those I trust can vouch for the fact that I still check up on them throughout their time with him.
It's funny, because I'm not looking for a dad for my kids. They have one of those.
I'm not looking for a husband. I've HAD one of those.
Let me just toot my own horn here and say that I AM fun to be around. And outgoing. And a sports fan. I'm silly. Sometimes loud. (okay, a lot of the time.)
I'm low maintenence. And I like chocolate. And baseball. hint hint.
I like to hang out with my friends and have a good time. That doesn't mean I'm planning the wedding!!!!
That's not to say that I don't enjoy snuggling up on the couch for a few episodes of Smallville. Or whatever. Because I do.
I have had so many people ask me about what I want. Who knows?? And besides that, who cares??? I don't "want" anything right now!!
I feel like I'm getting irritated. Breathe, Tina.......
Anywho, I think I speak for most single moms (and dads) out there when I say that part of why we're not into 'dating' is because we have our routine with our kids, and our lives. Do you think I want someone else coming in and screwing that up? When you're single and have no kids, you can do whatever, whenever. Go to bed at 4am and wake up at 7am for work? Sure! Now? Go to bed at 9:30 and wake up at 7.....still sleepy. Ha.
We also get to spend what we want, when we want, on what we want. Rascal Flatts' new CD is out? I must buy it! I'm craving Taco Bell? Let's drive thru!
Do I want to get married again? Maybe. Maybe not.
If it's in the plan, then this:
will also be part of the plan. Oh yes. Some sort of baseball WILL be a part of the ceremony.
I have to say, not giving someone a chance because of what you *think they want, vs what they actually do want, could possibly be a big mistake. I've made this mistake before.
And now, after these ramblings, it's time for bed. Good night.